The Milky Way

This afternoon, we went out shopping. Just a little grocery run, it was nice to get out though, and we stopped at Tim Hortons and had a doughnut. yum! Got home around 4-5pm, and attempted to feed Jon, who decided he was too angry to eat, So we gave him a bath while he was already pissed off. ha! After that he did eat for all of 5 minutes, and then fell asleep. I laid down on the couch, thinking i wasn't feeling very good. At some point hubby made cheese steak sandwiches for dinner, i recall him giving it to me and me mowing it down without even sitting up, much less opening my eyes, I still felt like shit. next thing i recall was hubby telling me the bed was made with clean sheets so i could go lie down, I did, still feeling kind of woozy and lightheaded, headache and still post pregnancy sore. I laid down and Toby put two pillows beside me and laid Jon down on them so i could feed him. Fine by me, I got him latched good and fell asleep again, I woke up a couple hours later to him nuzzling me again. Still feeling crappy, I just gave him the same breast, and fell asleep once more. Only for about 30 minutes this time, I woke up as he finished and had to go potty. As Toby took him away and i attempted to get up i realized something awful. My Milk had come in. The breast i had been laying on, the one I'd ignored for the last two feedings, was now double the size of it's partner, heavy and sore as hell, just begging to be drained, and my lillte one had a full tummy. The horror!

Broke out the pump, begged the boy to eat, took a hot shower, nothing... sitting here watching my boob get so big it's malformed may sound amusing, but it sure as hell hurts like a bitch. Jon finally ate, but not nearly enough, he fell asleep after about 10 minutes. so here i sit, ready to burst, watching the other breast slowly catch up in size.

You know how they always say breastfeeding shouldn't hurt? They lie. Or they omit things like, blisters on your nipple if you get a bad latch, breast engorgement, the pain of the let down reflex when baby starts sucking, or the fact that breast feeding releases oxytocin, which causes uterine contractions, which while great for helping your body recover from having the baby faster, are still contractions, You know the ones you suffered through in labour? THEY HURT. Goddamn it. i fully understand why there are so many women who CHOOSE not to breastfeed. I really do.

OK, Its not like I'm going to give up and formula feed just because it hurts, I like to think I'm made of stronger stuff than that! (This is an especially funny statement if you know me). Nevertheless a woman has a right to vent.

MILKING HURTS. Seriously. this sucks.


Krysis